Last Night

Last night I was at a social with friends form church. What an awesome time I had with saved and unsaved alike at the very same venue. My conclusion is that we’re all pretty much alike, we only conduct ourselves with different sets of principles – even as individuals – saved or unsaved.

Yesterday was kind of a down day for me emotionally (in fact the past week was) and I prayed that I would get out of this morbid mood and look at the positives in my life and the past experiences. In particular the positives of the person I’ve met and fallen hard for. Many questions crossed my mind…one in particular; “why me”.

There’s no answer to that question in my mind as yet. We fall in love, we fail in love and we have to heal our hearts when we fall out of love.

Being with this group of friends made me feel as if I actually belong somewhere. Meeting new people made me realize I am not that bad. Talking about my issues of the heart and confiding in my friends made me feel better. Last night I realised I am not alone, and even though my friends are very busy, they’re just a phone call away. Sometimes talking (really talking) from and about the heart has healing consequences.

I came to this conclusion. I deserve to be happy and only I am responsible for that happiness. Yes I wanted to be happy with the one I was with for this past few of months, but I cannot force anyone to be with me. So; last night I realised I actually like myself too much to allow myself all this pain.

Here’s to a new day!
Cheers!